Slightly More Gainful

Well I finally got hired somewhere.  YAY!  I am working for Mosaic merchandising.  I have picked up two jobs from them.  Well one, and possibly another one.  Talked to my favorite non stalking victim yesterday.  Things are aok :)

Is it all falling apart

I've tried to keep a very positive attitude about the whole getting fired thing, and I've had great people behind me, but now at every turn I feel frustrated and its taking its toll on so many things, my eating, by sleeping, my stress levels.  I had an interview with Cingular, that didn't go well, clearly.  I had an interview with Target and was offered a job almost immediately, which was great, except it was for $7.25 an hour.  Riiiiight.  I guess that should make me feel good that I was offered the job almost immediately, but I just am not looking at it that way right now.

And then theres the Doc issue.  I know he's busy.  He's been sweet about keeping in touch here and there since he left.  No better or no worse than he was before, which I guess is heartening.  Hypothetically that means things haven't gotten worse for him.  I know he's hella busy these days.  I just could use someone to lean on.  By god that bed is empty feeling lately...

Don't know what the hell to call this

The reality of my life is wearing on me a little.  I had a great couple of days and of course lost my heart a little bit more in the process.  I also came close to losing someone who's been very good to me over the years.  I am not really sure what to do with any of this other than I guess I need to verbalize what an idiot that I feel like about so many things, about how empty I feel again... please tell me I'm not completely stupid... and alone... again.